Review: Hosed

Hosed by Pippa Grant
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Do you know what the best thing about 2019 is so far? No? Well, let me tell you what that is…

An ARC of Hosed by Pippa Grant and Lili Valente arriving in my inbox on New Year's Day!



Now, you may be asking, how do I know if Hosed is the right read for me? And I may be sitting here shaking my head at you for even daring to ask that question! If you're on this review it’s because you either a) love everything that Pippa Grant writes and have to have it, b) love everything that Lili Valente writes and have to have it or c) love sexy smouldering firefighters falling in love with their nerdy next door neighbour girls. Or it could be all of the above, and with me, it's definitely that!

There's so much wonderful in this book (that may or may not be related to one adorable cock blocking trash panda by the name of George Cooney) that I barely know where to start! Cassie Sunderwell is all kinds of nerdy awkward - and for that I identify with her. She's the programming, gaming, technology queen who is totally out of her element in the little town of Happy Cat and at the helm of her sister's sex toy factory. Yesssss, you read that right - her sister runs from town after a nasty marriage breakdown (sheep man, damn those sheep!!!!) and leaves the care of her struggling business to her nerdy, virgin big sister.



Yup, recipe for disaster in the making!

But then there's Ryan O'Dell… All kinds of wonderful fireman - and he's going to get Cassie out of her sexually repressed shell! He's also going to get her to love the small town of Happy Cat over the anonymity of the big city she's used to. He's also the loving owner of George Cooney!

People, people please… While I love the sexual awakening of Cassie, George Cooney stole this show! I love him more than I love his namesake! Some of the most hilarious moments in this book come from this little Raccoon, and he doesn't let you forget it!



He's a total trash panda and he steals the freaking show! If you manage to snag a penis shapped lollipop from him, you know you've made an impression!

Favourite lines -

I do a double-take as I realize she's standing under a birch strung with dildos tied to anal beads. It's a Sexmas tree in June.

Cassie cries out again and scrambles off my lap and I'm left with a fat-ass, mood-killing raccoon curled around my shoulders like a mink stole.

The last time I saw George Cooney, he was sliding down Main Street on his fuzzy butt, assisted by mango-lime lube he'd liberated from a pump bottle during the near-death commotion with the allergic tourist.

I thought you WANTED me to experience sexual pleasure, not to get cockblocked by a trash panda!

"They're playing dildo-ball," Ruthie May explains. "It's like football, but with - "

Lingering Questions -

1. What are the rules of play for dildo-ball?
2. Will there be any books for the remaining O'Dell brothers because I wanna know what's up with Jace and Olivia?
3. What in the hell am I going to read now????



Make sure to One-Click this one! If this is the promise of what's to come this year, I can't wait to see what else these ladies have to offer in 2019!

View all my reviews